on being hard to read

why do i feel like i’ve blogged about this already… oh well… if i did.. i guess topic revisited… hope it at least has some new insight to add



I’ve been told that I’m hard to read on occasion. But that’s not true at all; I’m pretty open booked. Just because I’m not a audio book like some people on auto play all the time telling you what you want to know and what you don’t want to know, doesn’t mean I’m hard to read. I’m more of a traditional hardcover bound book with a plain cover. Most people don’t bother picking it up and flip through the pages. They either think the book doesn’t want to be read since it has no glamorous marketing cover, or it doesn’t give them enough things on the surface to spark that initial interest, or they are just too lazy to make the slight extra effort of picking it up and opening it.

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Gone with the Wind (part 3) ramblings

After more than 2 years, I’ve finally finished Gone with the Wind. I guess these days once i put a book down, it’s hard to remember to get back to it. I blame the internet.

(bear with me.. I’m not even going to bother edit or structure this… just gonna let the thoughts flow)
Anyways I read the whole book hating Scarlette… but in the end there’s nothing but pity for her… just like Rhett…. i guess she got what she deserved… but that’s also a harsh thing to say… she’s not exactly a villain… just awfully self-centered and without values… Throughout the book I questioned whether she really loved Ashley… i was fooled and truly believed she did for all that she’s done for him… until the end when she finally realized and admitted that she loved an image of Ashley she created in her mind, and she loved him because he’s something she couldn’t attain… I guess that’s still a form of love.. she just didn’t love him for who he truly is. Melony is really the only likable person in the book, she did almost no wrong throughout the whole book. She did not question Scarlette’s intentions, was only grateful for all that she’s done for her family. She stood by Scarlette till the the last moment, a true friend…. but then you can ask… does Melony really love Scarlette, or is she just fooled and also had her own image of Scarlette in her mind? But i think not…. i believe Melony knew all along why Scarlette kept helping her and her family… she knows about Ashley and Scarlette…. but she’s able to see past what they weren’t able to see themselves… she knows what’s between scarlette and ashley is purely infactuation, and ashley really loved her.  I started out liking ashley a lot… such a gentleman, intelligent, classy, handsome and kind…. but as the book went on… you realize how much of a coward and useless person he is… and he’s such a hypocrite… and he doesn’t even know his own feelings…. he lusts after Scarlett, and thinks himself righteous for staying chaste and faithful to melony…. it was wrong of him to lead scarlette on… but then who is to judge… i guess there is nothing really wrong with visiting someone you find attractive more often… and poor Rhett…. i have no idea what he sees in scarlette…. maybe he feels like he could relate to her… he feels like he’s been where she’s been and he wants to protect her… but her value system is totally off from his… he understands the need to fulfill people soulfully and physically… but scarlette’s main concern is the physical well being of herself and the people she “rules” over…. She’s self centered but she’s not selfish…. for she did not turn away whoever stayed at tara… she made sure everyone was fed…. it’s such a pity between rhett and scarlette… can’t believe two people who loved each other would wind up this way…. i guess it’s a lack of communication…. and insecurity from both parts… Rhett afraid of Scarlette holding his love for her over him… and scarlette always waiting for Rhett to back down first.. it was a struggle for emotional power over the other… they end up hurting each other and brewed up a ton of misunderstandings…

besides the romance… i love the historical significance of this book… not sure how accurate it is.. i hope it’s more or less historically accurate… one thing I’m confused about is the southerners/confederate are the democrats… and northerners/Yankees are known as the republicans…. i thought it would be the other way around… at least it’s the other way around this day and age…

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For Obama to win the first election, he had in parts Hilary Clinton to thank. America was probably like holy sh*t, a woman could have became a candidate and potentially a president… at least Obama is half white!

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这个世界归根到底围绕着的只是利益,金钱,与权力。。。 什么宗教,政治都只是虚构平台,来推广什么民主,真善美那些幌子。。。 为的只是给予常人一些安定剂与希望。。。这样群众们才好操纵。。。这网上许许多多的讯息又有哪些可信。。。一切背后的黑暗也许更本不是我们可以想象到的。。。 每个人都过着自己那毫无意义的生活,信着那些被灌输的富丽堂皇的终旨。。。 把黑暗推到脑后去。。。 这个世界已不可信。。。 医学界被药厂商操纵着。。。 眼医为的是卖眼镜。。。 政治人物勾搭着商人。。。 媒体被政治影响。。。 不能说着一切的一切是哪些邪恶人物造成的。。。因为他们也只是被自己的欲望操控着。。。 能说他们比常人过得更好更快乐吗?我觉得不至于。对于小时候被灌输的为人民服务,做个对社会有贡献的人我已不知该如何对待。。。

刚了解到法轮功背后的势力,李洪志只不过是个傀儡。。。其实法轮功组织本身就是个傀儡。。。 被各个反华势力给利用。。。 以前只当李洪志是个骗子,一切都是他一手造成的。。。 但是今天发现他们的影响力可以那么广泛凭一个人的力量是不可能的。。。 背后无数的隐形黑手造就了今天的法轮功。。。熟话说“有钱能使鬼推磨“。。。

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On a chat in the web conference at work….

AK: juc7x 3esx=[]]]]12jua]QGY5
AK: 66
AK: \]
AK: sorry, my cat had the sudden urge to type

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life is hard….

why do i have this innate lack sense of control? why can’t i remember a lot of times if you just ask you will get… i want to spin my own web, and not be spun…. so hard!!!

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